One day she just decided that no matter what happened; good or bad, she was just where she was meant to be. And that was perfect, because it meant that she was headed in the direction of her destiny and learning all she needed to learn in her quest to be the best 'her' she could be. Happiness is afterall a choice.
So I wrote that, and I feel it in my depth of depths.
I've gone through all the stages of grief with this one...
1) Shock and Denial
2) Pain and Guilt
3) Anger
4) Bargaining and Begging
5) Depression
6) Reconstruction 7) ACCEPTANCE (together or separate - I'm not sure...)
I could go through this list and point out exactly when I was feeling that way. Human emotions are a tricky thing. You can be the strongest person, with an amazing clear-thinking mind, but emotions can make the sanest of people crazy. There are times emotions CAN NOT be controlled.
I remember many a night, tears streaming down my face, while I argued with myself. I knew truths in my head but fear would continuously knock me sideways.
As cliché as it may sound, I can now say "I've been there." "I've gone through that too." "I understand how you are feeling." Before they may have been just words, but now I can truly appreciate another in this situation.
I also understand that no matter what someone else says - you have to work out things for yourself. You have to go through these stages on your own and there are no time-frames, no secrets, and no quick fixes. All I can guarantee you is YOU WILL MAKE IT.
So, I'm going to say it again, only this way:
One day Theresa just decided that no matter what happened; good or bad, she was just where she was meant to be. And that was perfect, because it meant that she was headed in the direction of her destiny and learning all she needed to learn in her quest to be the best 'her' she could be. Happiness is afterall a choice.
