Uncertainty

I don't even know what to write, but I need to do something.  I'm so sick of feeling broken.  So sick of feeling like there is no way to heal.  I feel like I've forgiven and let go and released all my anger but I still have this nagging fear that won't go away.  I'll own my issues.  I know I can be bitchy and whiney.  I know that sometime I need to take a few deep breathes and think things through before responding - before starting something.  Who doesn't though? 

I just want to feel wanted.  I just want to feel loved.  Not just by anyone, by the man I gave my heart to so many years ago.  I understand marriages go through rough times, but not usually seemingly out of the blue.  Not when you felt like your life was all on track and you were on the same page and together.  Together.

I just don't get it.  I don't know what to do.  I don't know how to move forward.  I feel so stuck.

The saddest thing is I don't, at this point, even know what he could do to make it better.  I don't even know if he can...